Alright, alright, alright now... So, today, Friday, August 5, 2016 I was led of the Lord to street-preach
His Word (King James Version Holy Bible [KJV]) walking down Hoffman Street and then I made a quick break over to the Lyons Washateria; where I met a homeless elder Hispanic man I believe...
This man had his shopping cart of belongings in it and I asked him if the coin change around the concrete slab pillar was his and I picked the change up and put them on top of the concrete pillar.
The man really seemed "down-on-his-luck" and we did not engage in much casual conversation "talking".
In fact, because I'm usually the laidback "quiet listener" when other people are doing the talking, this time I felt led to initiate a brief conversation with the man to see if I could help him in any way.
I
HATE seeing people down in life that need help; it's never a good thing. God
LOVES everyone.
I asked the elder Hispanic man if he was from around the area but he just sat down, back hunched over, mind probably in a tired trance and I did not perceive if he was "fully there" when I politely, calmly and patiently spoke to him...
I won't go all into all the details of what followed up... but I had to
WALK AWAY and keep my distance from him for a moment he did something
VERY INAPPROPIATE to do in public (although I perceived not too many people were "eyeing" in our direction; at least I hope so... lol. Amen).
I said, "Hey sir, please don't do that. That's not right. Please sir, don't do that out in public..." as I motioned my back to block the view of some people who could have possibly seen in our direction as I stepped into the Washateria to avoid being seen with that "scene".
LORD GOD ALMIGHTY, PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR WHAT I'VE SEEN WITH MINE OWN EYES! O FATHER!
PLEASE FORGIVE ME of my SINS as I forgive those who have sinned against me. Amen!
So I went into the Washateria and after the "deed" was done came back out to speak to the man and share the
Gospel of Jesus Christ (KJV 1 Corinthians 15:1-4) with him. I said to the man, "Do you know the Gospel of Jesus Christ?" to which I didn't really get a clear answer or response; just he and I "eyeing" each other awkwardly for a brief while. Then I suggested sharing him the Gospel, I said, "Well the Gospel of Jesus Christ is 1.
Jesus Christ died on the Cross, 2.
Jesus Christ was buried and 3.
Jesus Christ rose from the dead back to life (on the third [3rd] day). If you believe in your heart the Gospel of Jesus Christ and you trust on Jesus Christ you are
SAVED and
FORGIVEN of your sins
BORN AGAIN of the
HOLY GHOST and inherit eternal life in Heaven."
To which he said "Yeah, yeah..." as he eyed out in the distance....
I told him I hoped he was alright and that I was concerned for him being out here on the streets. Said I don't "get into people's business" but whenever I can I am willing to do what I can to help people out in life.
I think he understood I meant him well as he's like "Yeah, yeah" and his eyes and face livened up when he saw some sincere compassion and empathy coming from another human-being.
In other people's eyes he's just an "old, raggedy, smelly, homeless bum" but in
GOD'S EYES he's a precious soul He wants to
LOVE and develop a relationship with in
FAITH. Amen!
Well, though I was willing to go further in helping the elder Hispanic man out I
NEVER "impose" myself or "force myself" on someone who does not want any help for the time-being so I told him I was heading off to the library. That I'm a Christian and a street preacher and left it there.
Lord knows He's led me to meet many unique and different people from all walks of life over the course of this journey and by His Grace, many more souls will be
WON TO CHRIST! Amen!
Okay, so, I'm walking done Lyons Avenue street-preaching
His Word (King James Version Holy Bible [KJV]) and I'm saying to people driving by in their vehicles are sorts of exhortations and one-liners of
REPENTANCE: "God loves you!", "Trust ye on the Lord Jesus Christ!", "Jesus Christ DIED for you!" "God loves you! Trust on His Son, Lord Jesus!" "Jesus Christ is the Way... The Truth... and the Life! Trust ye on the Holy Son of God, Lord JESUS CHRIST!" "God's calling out to you!" "You know you need GOD! We need GOD! It's never too late to TRUST ON JESUS!" and so on and so forth.
It's been quite a challenge and Test of Faith from the Almighty...
Thing is, a train was blocking the passage of Lyons Avenue and a lot of people had to go on the back streets to get on East Freeway to avoid being stuck by the train and so a lot of people were coming back in my direction and the Lord granted me opportunity to preach His Word to them along with the help of a few red traffic stop lights lol.
So... on the other side of the street on Lyons I saw "Ms. R", an elder black woman and elder sister in Christ who say, has lived a life "mainly on the streets" from what I've perceived. I met here shortly after moving here in Denver Harbor and every now-and-then I have everyday "encounters" with her from time-to-time.
Like many people living on the "fringes" of society like the streets; many people have their own little "agendas", "schemes" and con artist "manipulations" at play to "prey" on unsuspecting "street-ignorant", gullible, naïve folks.
So, when I first met Ms. R, I thought she was just an ordinary homeless person out of "luck" and "down in life"; so after a brief initial chat, we talked. I gave her 20 dollars and gave her food and stuff as I had available whenever I was around and saw her.
Turns out, long story short, she's a "regular street local" who just "chooses to live on the streets" for her way of life.
I've seen her always "hustling" for a ride out of town to Humble, Katy or someplace... asking people to take her places and doing whatever it is she does from place-to-place.
Thing is, she was a
MANIPULATOR using my sincere
KINDNESS for
WEAKNESS!
She always called by her "baby" in the sense of a kind of "motherly affection" but I always suspected it carried with it a hint of
DISRESPECT or
CONDESCENSCION trying to avoid the
REALITY of being in the presence of a strong, young man of
FAITH not "looking down on her" but rather "in respect and acknowledgment of her.
Anyways, she had a few incidents with different people, ended up in the hospital and was out with a cast on her left arm. The thing is she's always trying to "rationalize" and "
PROJECT" what
SHE NEEDS TO DO IN HER LIFE,
ON ME! lol. Amen.
Yeah, she'll say in that "sistahly voice", "You be careful... baby"; I'm like "Yeah, you as well. (lol to myself... Smh)".
One time she said that to me again and I said, "No, NO Ms. R! YOU are the one that needs be careful. I'm not the one "ending up in the hospital around here" on the streets. YOU need to be careful. NOT me." and she "caught herself" as her facial expression was "caught by surprise"; she knew it meant right.
And also I said things over the course of time like, "You need to stop on with smoking those cigarettes and drinking that stuff (i.e. "beer")"
JUST WHEN SHE JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL now living hard on the streets again... A continual endless cycle...
After a while, I stopped "giving her money" when I knew she was just using me and kindness for granted. I was trying to help her out any way I can, but after a while I soon realized she was "used to" living on the streets like she's always been doing and not trying to "move into a place of her own with her own life"; maybe that's how she'll always do. So I distanced myself from her. I prayed unto the LORD for His Wisdom in her life and doing all I could to witness Christ in my life to her life; did all I could and now it's in the Lord's Hands. Amen.
Anyways, saw her again today this time sitting at the park bench as I was street preaching here on Lyons Avenue and she said "Hey baby!" as she usually does and I said "Hey, I'll see you in a little while!" as I continue doing the Lord's Work.
Thus after a while, I heard the voice of someone calling out to me and I kept my place still hearing the man calling out until I was sure I perceived him "calling out to me" and not someone else (I don't like being "distracted" by people trying to keep me off course from doing what the Lord has me do) and I turned my back over to look behind me and see him as I walked over to him standing at Vargas Food Mart.
It was the same Hispanic man I had met
two days ago now...
We talked and parted ways...
After this, I see Ms. R walking down on the sidewalk. She turns to look behind to see if I was going to walk to her. I was on my way but the cars were driving by constantly in both directions of the street. I did not have the right time to cross over yet.
So when I finally cross over and am on my way to walking over to her... She's just "walked on" with her business like I never existed. Like a random stranger to her.
Oh yeah, she didn't have that same kind of "bubbly enthusiasm" towards me (if it was even genuine to begin with. I believe it's partial and superficial...), but when she saw me out street preaching the
Word of God (King James Version Holy Bible [KJV]) and not allowing myself to get sucked into a time-consuming conversation at the expense of me leaving doing the Work of God just to "talk to her"; she knows I mean
BUSINESS about the LORD and I'm not no "naïve", gullible person she can maneuver, manipulate and
USE to get money or something from for
HER SELF-BENEFIT. She never really asked "How I'm doing" to the same extent I was sincerely concerned for her welfare. It was not the same. I can tell the difference. I know when people actually care about my own personal well-being as I do them.
But in the end, I gotta cut Ms. R some slack, she
DID give me a nice bottle of cologne to wear a few months back... She "gave back" in her own ways to some extent. I still have it and use it for when I'm going to church. It's good stuff. A good scent.
I don't expect or want people to be "obligated" to "help me back" because I helped them out in life. I only hope that people I help would be
WILLING TO HELP ME OUT IN COMPASSION the same way I "had their backs" when they needed it.
It's the
FEELING of
KNOWING someone
WOULD HELP ME BACK because they actually
WANT TO, not to "pay me back" for helping them out in "obligation". I don't care for that. I love to help people and I like to think people I help would do the same for me.
I just like the idea, someone else would "have my back" when I'm in need as I do for those I do my best to help out.
Anyways, women like her, I know
I CAN'T TRUST but deep down she seems like she "means well" but just can't be trusted with the true "big stuff" to actually
HELP OUT SOMEONE ELSE than
JUST YOURSELF. Not really "going anywhere" with anything but just schmoozing along life
USING PEOPLE IN THE PROCESS.
I don't trust people like her with my life, but for some small things I think she "could do" but that would only be if she is
WANTING TO HELP ME OUT. Not really...
She was
OUT ONLY FOR HERSELF first trying to "get something from me" with any sly,
slick new tactic she would say...
Anyways, she realized I was not going to "enable" her to live her usual life on the streets as her "lil' boy toy" provider boy. Just "giving her money" ... to spend of beer and/or cigarettes... Not like she's using mainly to "pay bills" or some nature (to my knowledge lol). Using handouts for want
SHE WANTS.
Smh... I have
FAMILY and
FRIENDS I've been knowing I need to pay back and help back that have helped me in the past than to just "give out money" to someone who's been living on the streets there
WHOLE LIVE without any intention of actually wanting to move on in life into a house or apartment.
People like this just
LIVE OFF THE KINDESS OF PEOPLE without really trying to
HELP THEMSELVES OUT and I can't and must
NOT "enable" that kind of wicked, errant lifestyle mindset of "getting over" people to continue. It's
NOT "healthy" for the people or society.
NOT the way to go.
Please don't get me wrong;
I CARE for
HOMELESS PEOPLE since I actually was
HOMELESS as well and I understand the hardships...
But what I'm talking about here are the
ABUSERS OF THE SYSTEM: schemers, manipulators and
CON ARTISTS "living off people" as a way of life and not "paying their way" to move on and live on their own; simply just users
USING PEOPLE to take care of them their whole way in life; without reciprocating the same concern to those that help them.
I'm
NOT talking about the unfortunate homeless people who lost their jobs, evicted out of their homes, apartments or housing and are actually trying to get their lives back on track of a normal life in society who don't "manipulate" and "use" people to make it through life.
It's okay if people
CHOOSE TO BE HOMELESS as a way of life, just please don't "play me as a fool" to use me to get money and/or resources from me leaving me to "hang and dry" and then turn a "blind eye" and don't give a rat's b-hind when I'm in need being cold, naked and hungry starving out here in the wilderness and you go home to a warm, cozy home at night! Amen!
I wouldn't "cheat you" like that! Amen!
I've helped out people homeless, that if it was role-reversed in my heart-of-hearts
I KNOW they would not have did me as
GOOD as
I DID THEM! More often that
NOT I'm sure many of these people would
BETRAY ME and turn a "blind eye" if it was me again in the homeless situation. Right out
IGNORING my existence as "just another" typical, poor black, uneducated ghetto homeless guy living on the streets with no future in their
VAIN MINDS... Amen!
Do unto others as you would have them
DO UNTO YOU! It's the Way we should
ALWAYS live our lives. Amen!
~ Sincerely,
Bro. Jed